strawburagirl89's Xanga Sitemy thoughts..
strawburagirl89
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Name: cora
Location: Maryland, United States
Birthday: 1/2/1989
Gender: Female


Interests: umm i don't have any...
Occupation: Student
Industry: Construction


Message: message me


Member Since: 12/6/2003

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Thursday, January 01, 2004

hey everyone...

well i'm back home and i hate it... i want to go back to Key West soo bad . i love it there.. i swear i forgot all the shit in my life when i went there. and that place feels like home i know that is weird but it really does. when i get there i fit right in with everyone and i just click right in. everyone is so nice down there too. i want to go back so bad. i mean i missed my friends.. but i feel bad saying this but i kinda forgot about them. i know thats really bad but thats how much i love it down there.. i just forget about everyone else in Maryland. but know that i've been going down there for a couple years and gotten used to it down there i know what i'm going to do for the future. i'm gonna go to school down there then teach down there.. or somewhere close.. i just can't let Key West go... but yeah anyway lets talk about my trip and why i love it soo much . I went to the beach everyday and got all tanned up! and i went snorkling and kayaking.. which was a blast. and i went shopping and saw all the cool people down there. but there are alot of homeless people down there. and it is sooo sad to see them. they literally live on the beach and on the side of the road. it was so horrible you wanted to help but it's like where do you begin? but god was it a blast. so many things to do down there. and i think that if i do move down there i might open a shop. maybe with jewlery in it.. cuz i love to make stuff like that.. but yeah it's paridise down there and i can't wait to go back. but i guess i will just have to deal with it.. but yeah that was my trip... i had a great Christmas though. My grandma made a great dinner.. and church was cool and i got some really cool stuff. i think my favorite present was my gift card to JoAnn Fabric's..lol now i can buy some fabric and make something.. but yeah enough about that... so yeah my birthday is tomorrow. i don;t think i'm doing anything. Hopefully george can coem over that'll be fun! i love him so much! but hollin takin me shopping with her Saturday!!!! and i can't wait!!!!! OMG i miss her soooooo terribly! then she is coming over my house to spend the night! i called her as soon as i got home and we talked 4 ever! we caught up on everything in our lives! god i'm so glad she is my friend. My only true friend in the world! but i can't wait i was jumping around all night!! i'm sooo happy and excited! well yep my birthday is tomorrow and i can't belive it lol! i'm gonna be 15.. sooo old  but ok lets talk about something else.. what have i left out??? ooo i know! my love life!! hahaha ok well as we all know i don't have one. but when i went to florida i nocticed i was lonely. but then again i don't know if i wanna be tied down. i mean when i was down in key west alot of guys were looking at me and i didn't have to feel bad if i talk to any of them of looked back at them. but then again i wanna have someone.. ahh i;m soo confused... there is something wrong with me... but i don;t know if i like anyone.. but i read the best thing today.. in this kids journal thingy.. and it was about me. and i got soo happy when i read it.. and this kid is sooo sweet and so nice to me... but i never see him which makes me mad cuz i wanna hang out with him more.. so we decided we would hang out more and see where it goes.. but he is soo great! but i think i'm gonna go.. peace

cora


Saturday, December 20, 2003

hey everyone...

ok so lets see what is going on in my life??? hummmm well yesterday.. i had practice and that was fun and super hard.. we had to swim 100 laps which is 75,000 yards which is a mile and a third... but it felt good to do all that.. so then Maggie came over and slept over.. we had fun we watched a movie then went to bed.. then in the morning we watched the wedding planner.. which made me sooooo depressed and lonley.. ahhh.. o well i'll never find that fairytale love. but yeah.. i wish sooo bad i could fall in love and find a good person.. someone who could walk with me and kiss me on the cheek and just love me for me... with out wanting more.. yeah know.. most guys are such pigs.. it's hard to find good guys... i thought i found one but i seroiusly doubt he likes me at all.  it makes me soo sad but i gotta get over it.. hopefullly while i'm gone i'll stop thinking about him and just lose the feelings i have for him and just think of him as a friend.. but we were in the car today and i started day dreaming about him... it's soo pathitic... lol but yeah.. so lets see i want love thought i had it but nope.. and i will never find that kinda love.. so thats my love life. so lets see anything happy happen to me? well i went to my aunt and uncle's today for a Christmas party. that was soo much fun! my aunt and uncle and cousin from Boston came down.. my cousin is soo cute.. she was dancing for everyone. and then my cousin Teri from Cali came into town. i loved seeing her. hopefully some time soon i can go out and vist her in Cali... i would love to spend time with her. but yeah that was alot of fun. i love my family so much, i caught up with my cousin Jamison.. god we have had some good times.. and i caught up with my cousin Gabby.. she is cool too. but yeah and now i'm getting ready to go to my other aunt's in like an hour and celebrate Christmas with them.. that'll be fun! so yeah.. i'm not gonna be writing for awhile cuz i'll be away.. so i'll write more later... so peace

cora

   


Thursday, December 18, 2003

hey everyone..

sorry i havn't written in a while. I've been soo busy. so ok lets see whats on my mind... well on tuesday we had a meet i did really bad.. but o well what can you do? i was having a bad night i guess. but yeah i still had fun cuz i got to hang with my team... but lets see.... wedesday was a good day i really don't remember much of it but i think it was a good day. today was a good day. kinda boring. but i got to leave school early for early practice. so that was good! and practice was hard but i felt good. i'm really proud of myself. swimming is alot of hard work and i'm glad i'm not complaing and being a bad team player. i love to swim and the more i do it the more i love it.. so it's good to work hard and get better. but i had the best ride on the bus! maggie, anna and i all put our hair on will's jacket and said we were donating to the lock's of love for him! it was soo great! and then we got this other girls hair and maggie measured it and it was 21 inches long!! it was soo great! so yeah that was alot of fun. i have so much with my girls! but wow christmas is coming up soo fast. it doesn't even feel like christmas. i'm so excited about key west.. but i'm really gonna miss maryland too. i mean i love going down there but it can be kinda lonley.. i mean i have to spend the whole time with my mom and dad.. which isn't that bad but for a 8 days it can be kinda rough. so i'm gonna make the best out of it. i also can't wait to see my grandparents! i love them to death and miss them dearly! but yeah.. i'm soo exicted... so lets se what else is there to say.. well i know what about my love life.. o yeah i don't have one! haha.. no i kinda like this kid but i know i would never have a chance wih him.. so i guess we are just gonna be friends cuz i know he would never think of me as anything more than a friend. so i guess i will be loveless for awhile.. which is ok with me. i like being single it's like a big relief.. i mean you don't have to worry what people say.. eventhough people already say things.. which are none of their bussiness and are false... but lets move aside from that.. so yeah that's my life.. fun isn't it! haha! well i will write more later. peace

oooo yeah.. i forgot yesterday my mom got me a cell phone! yay! if you ever wanna talk which i know you don't.. my # is 443-417-7800.. ok byebye

cora


Sunday, December 14, 2003

hey everyone....

i'm sooo happy it snowed! maybe we will have a white Christmas! and i hope we have a delayed opening tomorrow!  i would love to sleep in! so today was ok! mostly in the morning i packed for Key West. i can't wait to go! i get to be in the sun.. o i'm just happy thinking about it.. and like my mom says i need to get away and not worry about things. Key west is definitly the place to get away... it's soo lovely down there nothing could go wrong. and i really do need to get away.. but yeah.. so my dad and i went to wal mart and got some thinsg for the trip.. on the way there we listened to some music. i love singing with my dad and riding in the car. we always have so much fun and he makes me soo happy... so then we went to Jo Ann Fabric's and i got to fabric and im gonna make a purse! i'm soo excited  i love making things.. it makes me feel soo good...  so i came home and chilled out. and steve called that made me very happy! i love him alot and he is another one of those great friends that are hard to find and i'm lucky to have him! so we talked.. which is always fun. then i called hollin!!! ahh god i miss her soooooo much! and we talked about my birthday and how i wanted her to spend the night and hagn out.. i hope she can her dad's birthday is the same day and see will probably do something with him. which i totally understand i mean it's her dad.. but i really miss her and i want her to come over soo bad.. so i hope she can or else i won't be doing anything for my birthday.. just spending it with my parents.. which is ok i guess. But i would much rather spend it with my best friend hollin. sigh ... but yeah.. so thats about all thats new with me.. i can't wait to get to school though! i miss alli and maggie and anna and everyone else.. i miss someone else too..  but that's private.. i don't wanna say cuz i don't want more rumor's to start.. so lets just say i wanna have school tomorrow.. and i wanna go swimming soo bad.. i miss the water. and i have a meet tuesday and i have to get ready for it.... i wish i could live in the water soo much.. it just helps me soo much.. when i'm in the water i forget about everything and i'm in my own world... that's why i can't wait till key west.. o how i want this week to go by.... oo yeah one more thing i heard this song today... me and my dad we're singing it and it's really good here it is:

Zombie

Another head hangs lowly
Child is slowly taken
And the violence caused such silence
Who are we mistaken

But You see it's not me,
It's not my family
In your head, in your
Head they are fighting
With their tanks, and their bombs
And their bombs, and their guns
In your head,
In your head they are cryin'
In your head
Zombie
What's in your head, in your head
Zombie

Another mother's breakin'
Heart is taking over
When the violence causes silence
We must be mistaken
It's the same old theme since 1916
In your head,
In your head they're still fightin'
With their tanks
In your head they are dying

                                               In your head, in your head
                                                           Zombie

                                                 by the cranberries

i will write more tomorrow or later.. peace

~*cora*~


Saturday, December 13, 2003

ok...

so i had a good day. i went to the Baac with my mom and ran a mile. then i went over to George's  that was alot of fun! i missed him so much. we watched a movie and talked and hung out and a saw him broken arm... poor George i feel so bad for him  but i love him any way!  he is a great friend! so then i came home and got ready for Niki's ballet! she did soooo good! omg i wish i could do that soo much. but yeah.. back to my depresing life... so many peopel are mean to me.. but o well i don't care about them.. they think they know me but they don't and they only belive what they hear and not what the truth is even if it slapped them in the face... so yeah this kid was being mean to me and saying shit and he only met me once and know he hates me but i'm soo glad bcuz he said he never wants to talk to me again and i never want to talk to him again! so this is great! i think him telling me that he doesn't want to talk to me was the best part of my day! and he probably thinks i'm crushed but not at all! i love that he never wants to talk to me! and plus he thinks all this shit and it's not true and he belives what other peopel say and not what i say even though i know the truth and they don't. it makes me laugh kinda.. bcuz people belive anything they hear even if it's not the truth and i feel very bad for him and for others like that... it's soo sad that they belive stuff like that so they can be cool or start rumors.. they just have no lives.. and i have a life.. and i feel very bad for those people.. i hope they change.. but wow.. now i'm kinda happy! all these people who started all this shit don't wanna have anything to do with me and i'm soo happy!!!! now they can leave me alone and get their friends to leave me alone cuz they can't stick up for themselves! haha! so now i can get back to my life.. now that these people are gone.. i can start over and just erase them from my life.. sometimes i wish i was soo small (even smaller than i already am haha) and disapper so no one could see me or talk about me.. i wish soo bad i went to a different school in a different state.. in a different world.. but i know i can't so i gotta suck it up a deal with it and find my real friends in life.. and so far i have some realyl great friends and i'm making some... so i guess i'm doing ok.. i will survive.. lol i just have to think of all the good things going for me right now.. like swimming.. i love swimming when i get in the water i forget about everything and i makes me feel soo good.. adn when i'm not in the water i wish i was.. and i'm gonna try and real build some friendship's.. like alli.. my bird <()> i miss her soo much and i never talk to her.. i saw her tonight but didn't get enough time to really talk to her.. and there is hollin.. god i really really miss her.. it's bad enough i don't see her everyday.. i just never get to talk to her during the week and if we are lucky we see eachother on the weekends.. but i'm really happy for hollin too.. she has made some great friends and i'm happy for her.. lets see who else do i miss.. i miss allyson i know everyone says mean things about her but she is my friend and i love her and i wish peopel would get to know her before they judge.. but o well not everyone can change.. and i miss jenn.. we used to be best friends.. now we hardly even talk to eachother.. and i miss that.. i love her alot too. ok so i think my new years resolution will be to rebuild my friendships and make some new ones.. like maggie and anna! i love them to death! they are great friends and i'm so glad they are on the swim team with me..  well i have one last thing to write i think.. i heard this song today and i know everyone has heard it but i don't know if everyone has heard the lyrics' and what they mean.. and as i was listening to it i really understood what they meant.. and i think everyone else shoudl too....

                                                                       Beautiful by: Christina Aguilera

Everyday is so wonderful, then suddenly, it's hard to breath, now and then i get insecure. from all the pain. i'm so ashamed

I'm beautiful no matter what they say. words can't bring me down.I'am beautiful in every single way. yes words can't bring me down today

to all your friends you're delirous, so confused in all your doom, trying hard to fill the emptiness the pieces gone, let the puzzle undone, is that the way it is

you are beautiful no matter what they say. words can't bring you down. cause you are beautiful in every single way. yes words can't bring you down. so don't you bring me down today.

no matter what we do, no matter what we say,we're the song inside the tune,full of beautiful mistakes,and everywhere we go,the sun will always shine,and tomorrow we might awake on the other side

cause we are beautiful no matter what they say. yes words can't bring us down. we are beautiful in every single way. yes words can't bring us down. so don't you bring me down today.

so for all of you who think you can hurt me.. i don't think you can and i hope that you can change and stop trying to fit in with everyone else and be yourself and stop doign what society wants you too.

peace.. cora



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